Sufficient Encouragement Refresh– Chapter Twenty-Four

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Chapter Twenty-Four

The morning pre-arranged for his walk with Elizabeth, Darcy’s heart pounded as he sat in the carriage. How did Bingley and Arlington do this all the time? Darcy could not idly flirt like Arlington and Richard or even be open and friendly like Bingley. He was loath to admit it, but he was used to deference. He was confident enough in his own character and honour, but typically by the time an acquaintance discovered that about him, they had already viewed him as the superior in the relationship. The fact was very few people had use of him if not to gain something from him. Although he was not titled, he was rich and related to a powerful earl. Attempts at appearing ordinary were fruitless, and he had never before had to truly court the good opinion of someone. He knew enough of Elizabeth’s character to know that she would not be taken in by pretentious things. He regretted he lacked the charm and amiability of his two friends.

On their last visit to Longbourn, Bingley was a ball of nerves. Now he sat contentedly, his smile growing by every mile that brought them closer to Longbourn. More than once in his friendship with the man, Darcy envied him but never more so than now. The only thing that brought relief was the presence of his cousin. Arlington intended to observe Elizabeth again but had said he thought she was “inclined to be partial to Darcy.” He was growing quite indebted to his cousin. Being six years older than Darcy, Arlington often ignored the younger boy as a child. By the time Darcy reached adulthood, the viscount had indulged in a lifestyle of which Darcy wanted no part. Instead, he grew closer to his cousin in the army, Richard, who was also Georgiana’s co-guardian. However, Darcy was impressed at Arlington’s agreement to leave London and assist Darcy with Georgiana. Perhaps his cousin was, at last, accepting responsibility.

Georgiana fidgeted beside him. “Are you well?” he asked her.

“Yes.”

Darcy raised his brow at her, unconvinced by her curt reply.

“Are you not looking forward to calling on Longbourn?”

“Of course, I am!”

“Then explain your anxiety.”

She cast her eyes down and took a deep breath. “I did not sleep well.”

“Should we return?”

“No, I was too excited about today to sleep last night. Do not fret.”

“Darcy quit being her nurse,” Arlington said.

He rolled his eyes at his cousin and assessed Georgiana again. She did not look ill, but he thought he detected anxiety behind her eyes. Deciding that remarking on such would only heighten her feelings, he turned his attention to Bingley. “You did well to keep your sisters at home.”

“It was Arlington. He had everything arranged with Caroline by the time I came down for breakfast.”

“I merely suggested that she could set a better table than Mrs. Bennet and how after a morning of calls I look forward to a good meal,” Arlington said while shrugging his shoulders. “She is not so terrible if you actually speak to her instead of treating her as a bother.”

“I have had a lifetime of trying and have yet to learn that trick. You have a gift, Arlington, truly,” Bingley said.

“The natural politician in you,” Darcy said with a smirk.

Arriving at Longbourn, they set about to their pre-ordered duties. Worried that the younger sisters would desire to walk with them, Georgiana asked to speak with Elizabeth alone in the garden. Darcy did not know what Georgiana planned to talk about, but after several minutes, Arlington stood and suggested Darcy go with him to check on the horses.

“They are my best racing greys. I could not leave them in London lest my brother use them for his own devices.”

“Racing! That sounds terribly adventurous!” Miss Lydia exclaimed.

“It is, and when I return, I shall tell you about the time I broke my arm leaping from certain death.”

“Oh!” Lydia and Catherine exclaimed in unison, and the gentlemen took the opportunity to leave the room.

“Excellent plan, Arlington.”

“Those silly girls would not know the first thing about racing or horses.”

“Missing London?”

“No, it is really not so different there where there are so many insipid ladies with a lot less innocent arts and motivations vying for your attention. I suspect you know that, of course.”

“Indeed.” It was why Elizabeth was so rare, although he recalled being surprised by his conversation with Lady Belinda. “However, there are some ladies in Town who may surprise you.”

“Changing your mind?”

“No, no. I only meant that I did not find the lady your mother wishes you to meet to be so terrible.”

“I am not the marrying sort,” he said. Darcy chose to remain quiet until they found the ladies.

At first, they went unnoticed as they approached. “I do not think I understand, Georgie. Could you tell me more?”

Georgiana furrowed her brows and then noticed the gentlemen. “Here they are!” She smiled at them. “Now lead the way, Lizzy.”

Elizabeth looked confused but nodded. “I thought I would show you all Oakham Mount today.”

“Are you fond of mountains?” Darcy asked nervously.

“I have not experienced very many, as there are none in Hertfordshire,” she confessed. “I have seen sketches of the peaks in Derbyshire. They seem breathtaking.”

Darcy smiled. “Perhaps one day you may journey there. They are far better in life than in books.”

Elizabeth laughed. “Indeed! I do hope I can convince you that I am more than a great walker and reader.”

“You enjoy music,” he put forward.

“How politic of you! You do not say that I excel at performance, just that I enjoy it.”

She raised a teasing eyebrow, and her eyes twinkled. Darcy felt a smile tug at his lips. “I have had the pleasure of hearing you play many times now. Do not pretend to be afraid of my opinion. You must know you play well.”

“Your brother paints too nice a picture of me.” She turned to Georgiana. “Perhaps he is fishing for me to return the favour.”

“Oh no! He would never…” Georgiana ceased as Elizabeth winked at her. Darcy wondered what Elizabeth was playing at.

“I have determined he is a most accomplished gentleman. Why, as a brother, cousin, and friend, he is constantly given a good name. And to all this he adds something more.”

“What is that?” Arlington broke in, enjoying Elizabeth’s high spirits.

Meeting Darcy’s eye, she held it before replying with a smile, “He excels at dancing.”

The others laughed along with her, for it was no secret to his sister or cousin that he hated dancing, but Elizabeth’s laughter rose above the rest. It settled in his heart. Suddenly, he had no use for Arlington’s presence. He believed she quite welcomed his attentions, and whether she did or not, he would fight until he won her heart. He was sick of timidity.  Belatedly, he realised he had not replied with more than a smile, and Elizabeth awkwardly turned and rushed ahead. Arlington followed her, and Darcy stepped forward, but Georgiana touched his arm.

“I told her about Mr. Wickham,” she said.

The euphoria Darcy felt came crashing down. “What?”

“I…I needed a lady’s opinion on falling in love.”

His heart began to beat again. “And what did she say?”

“She said true love creates only beauty around it. That if I was feeling sorrow or inadequacies, then it was not love.” Darcy nodded as Georgiana continued speaking. “She said love was selfless.”

He cast his eyes over the path as Elizabeth and Arlington drifted out of sight. “She sounds as though she has been struck with Cupid’s bow before.”

“I cannot say for sure, but I think she may be quite smitten with someone.”

“Oh?” His heart thundered in his ears so loudly that he worried he would not hear Georgiana’s words.

“You, silly!” She smiled brightly, and Darcy grinned back. “But I was worried her opinion of you might alter if she spoke to Mr. Wickham. That is when I told her that sometimes people who claim to be friends are quite untrue. I suggested that a young man she recently met may be dishonest.”

Darcy furrowed his brow, recalling what he overheard her say. “Did you ever mention Mr. Wickham by name?”

“No, I could not bring myself to do it.”

They were interrupted by Arlington bounding towards them. “I have been instructed by Miss Elizabeth to retrieve you two. She believes there is a view Darcy shall quite enjoy.”

He smiled and clapped Darcy on the back in clear congratulations. Desiring to end talk of Wickham, he walked briskly back to Elizabeth’s side. Surely she was intelligent enough to understand Georgiana meant Wickham. As they continued on their trek, thoughts of his enemy disappeared entirely. Life was too full of light and laughter to consider such darkness.

*****

Jacob Truman shifted about Richard’s dressing room. As he silently put away various accessories, Truman considered that he should think of Richard as his master. However, the two men had seen hell on Earth on the battlefields of Spain. As a descendant of a former slave, Truman had understood the world was prejudiced and unjust towards people of colour. He was ill-prepared, however, for how he might be treated in Army life.

Richard, at last, appeared in the bedchamber. Truman went to him. “How did the meeting go?”

“I made a blasted ruin of it all again.”

“It’s not like you to upset the General.”

“Oh! Yes, I saw the General. He is considering installing William Gordon as the Brigadier. We are to meet with him later this week.”

Richard began dressing and handed Truman articles of clothing to put aside appropriately. After several minutes of silence, Richard spoke. “I had an additional errand today, and that is what I was referring to as ruining. Again. You are a man of the world, Truman. I would welcome your insight.”

“I would not call myself thusly, however, I will gladly assist you in any way.”

“Have you ever been in love?”

The question startled Truman so much, he dropped the cufflinks he was attempting to put away. Truman had heard Richard’s story of a young lady who had done him wrong. However, Truman was less forthcoming than his friend. “A long time ago.”

“It’s easy to guess it ended badly.”

“Indeed. I was mistaken in her affections.”

“That is because women can have no sincere affection.”

“Do you really believe that? Or are you merely angry the one before did not have sincere affection for you?”

“It was not merely Lucy’s betrayal that has shaped my opinion. Through the years, I have seen ladies court wealth and titles above seeking the affections from honourable gentlemen they believe are lesser.”

“I tend to agree with you. However, ladies have much less freedom than gentlemen. They are beholden to their families and even after marriage have little means to independence. Many might settle for contentment instead of risking family disapproval for their heart’s desire. Fortune is relative. There’s no guarantee on it. One wastrel head of the family might dissipate it all. One poor investment might ruin a family.”

“Are you justifying a lady’s pursuit of money at all costs?”

“No. When my love broke our engagement, she said it was out of concern for family approval. Indeed, we already knew her family would disapprove on some extent, and so we planned an elopement. On the eve of the departure, she chose to break our understanding entirely. She said she could not bear to lose her family in such a way.”

Richard grunted. “That may be sensible, but I think if two people are truly in love they would not wait on sense.”

“Could there be lasting happiness without sense?”

Richard was silent for a while and then seemed to desire to change the conversation. “Tomorrow, I must see the doctor.”

“Is the wound troubling you?”

“No, but he made me vow to continue the checks and so I must journey to the Royal Hospital. Upon my return, we will set out to see the Brigadier-General Gordon.”

“Very well.” Truman mentally noted that Richard would prefer to wear a uniform to such engagements. He also made it a habit of donating funds and necessities to the hospital at each visit. Truman would prepare a package.

“Have your leave, Truman. I am dressed now for dinner and will not need you again until before bed.”

Truman nodded and left his friend. Instead of going below stairs, he returned to his shared chamber with the earl’s valet. The other servants were not hateful, but he could tell that they disliked how friendly Richard treated him. He never had to spend hours fussing over the clothes and instead had more time for leisure than the others. He supposed it would be wiser to attempt to learn more about the station of valet and show interest in becoming a butler, but Truman was far from deciding to remain in household service. There was something more dignified in serving as batman on the battlefield than in being a servant in a house.

But then, that was Truman’s pride in his ancestors. His grandfather had been a slave purchased by an English officer in fifty-eight and then brought to England and freed. He stayed on as valet and later butler. Truman’s father was his only son and upon the elder’s death, the younger Mr. Truman had enough money to open a shop. His father struck a friendship with a manufacturer near Leeds. They became so close that the man sent Jacob to school at Eton with his son. In hindsight, it was not the great gift Mr. Bingley likely thought it was. Truman could now read and write Greek and also kill a man but could hardly maintain ledgers. Taking over his father’s store seemed impossible. The prejudice he faced in the army, especially if Richard retired, was not only insupportable but dangerous. Truman felt like a pilgrim with no home.

Of course, home did not forget him. Going to the small desk in the room, he pulled out his sister’s latest letter.

Dear Jacob,

We were so happy to learn you have returned unscathed to England. I am sure I do not have to remind you that your contract is almost up. Father and I have counted the years, then months, and now days eagerly. You have proved your duty to your country, now prove your duty to your family and return to Leeds. Father is ready to hand the store to you. Do not tell me you are still bitter over C’s treatment. Were not eighteen years of happy memories enough to wipe out the bad ones?

My sister Sally begged to be remembered to you. You will not keep her waiting longer, will you? You know how all the area expects the match.

Now, I will scold no more. Your niece now knows her entire alphabet and wishes to meet her uncle at last.

Write when we can expect to see you and pray, let it be for more than a week.

Your sister,

Letitia Johnson

Truman shook his head. He remained uncertain of the future, but life in Leeds and married to his sister’s sister-in-law was surely not it. It was true his family expected him to take over the shop. They and all of the coloured community in Leeds thought he would, and it was no secret that Sally Johnson was sweet on him when he left for the army. The truth was, Caroline would not have been the only one to face the displeasure of one’s family had they married. The difference was Truman believed his family would support his happiness no matter what, and when it came down to it, he never felt tied down by expectations. He defied convention his whole life. All he wanted was to find his own way with the freedom he saw others enjoy. It was never easy, even for one as privileged as Richard—son of an earl—but it was far more possible.

In his drawer, he kept other letters from family and friends, including, Letitia’s poetry she had sent him over the years. He also kept a sketch he had made of Caroline Bingley. Her blonde hair and blue eyes could not have been more different than his dark ones, but it was not that which held her beauty. It was the look of wonder she had in her eyes. Fresh and innocent. That was how he preferred to remember her. Not as sad and wise as at their last interaction when she broke their engagement. He wondered what those eyes would look like now. Had the years been generous to her? Had she married? And did that unnamed man, that Truman could not help but hate, love her as much as he still loved her?

Shaking his head, he put aside the sketch and withdrew a map. In his youth, he had been enamoured with the New World. He no longer looked at it with a young man’s naiveté, but with an older man’s cautious vision of potential. England held no draw for him, and the Continent would be impossible to travel to, for some time. Let other men battle over the same field and shed more blood. If he would shed blood in service to a country again, he desired it to be for one that could see past the colour of his skin. Tomorrow, he would see an old friend about purchasing fare to Upper Canada.