Truthful Tuesday- Alone time

finger on her lips. silence gesture

I’m an ambivert. I can be quite social and outgoing, especially via the internet but the truth is, I need quiet downtime. I need me time. All by myself. Honestly, it’s been the hardest thing about being a mother. Once my son started school, and then my daughter began preschool, I felt so much more relaxed. Since January, Teddy has been leaving school at noon. Now that he has an IEP, we’re hoping he can go the full day at the new school. He won’t be starting for over a week, but I’m very much looking forward to it. Previously, I only had about 2.5 hours after dropping both kids off at school before I had to pick Teddy up again. And while he mostly played by himself in the afternoon, he did need me sometimes, and I just had to be aware of him, and then battle with him to leave in time to pick Annie up. Not that I was spending that time on myself. I wasn’t.

First, I began intensive chiropractic care in January. For several weeks I had appointments three times a week. Gradually, I was able to go longer between appointments. And I’ve seen huge improvements from it. There were other appointments too along the way and my freak illness. Otherwise, I spent my time trying to work. I felt like I was constantly go, go, go. Once the kids were asleep for the night, I would try to work some more or spend time on the house or with my husband. Not to mention all the weeks he was out of town.

I’m looking forward to having a few minutes of quiet to myself each day again. I’ll have to build it into my schedule because I can be such a work-aholic but I’m really excited about me time again. I need it to organize my thoughts, and I think it really affects my productivity in a positive way.

Do you need alone time? If you do, how do you spend the time and how do you create the time to have it?

Positivity Monday- Turn the Page

turn the page

 

I can’t remember if I’ve posted this before, but if I have it’s worth repeating. I’m finally down in North Carolina! We’ll be heading back up for Easter and to do a final therapy appointment for my son but otherwise no more back and forth for any of us! It’s such a relief. That being said, I could just turn the page and try to carry on life as before but I know from experience that doesn’t go well with a move. I’ve got to start a new book.

Well, I don’t mean literally. I’m still working on Lord Darcy’s Bluestocking Bride and Kissed by a Lord. And Mr. Darcy’s Christmas Joy. And..and…and.

No, I mean figuratively. I’m looking forward to doing things differently than I had before. I’d like to cut eating out and cook more. I plan to spend more time outside. I want to actually get ready each day instead of just throwing my hair up in a bun and slapping on clothes. Simply having more space already feels life changing! What are things you’d like to do differently about life?

Truthful Tuesday- Judgey McJudgey

finger on her lips. silence gesture

I heard “Monday Confessions” on the radio yesterday. I also used to be on a forum that had “flame free Friday confessions.” My confession: I totally judge confessions!

I’m not saying I judge that they’re a bad or good person based on the confessions, but I can’t help but have some kind of visceral reaction whether I agree or disagree with their actions. Is that judging? Part of me wants to say no. But, then I looked up the definition.

  1. to form an estimate or evaluation of trying to judge the amount of time required; especially :  to form a negative opinion about shouldn’t judge him because of his accent

  2. 6:  to hold as an opinion :  guess, think I judge she knew what she was doing

So…yeah, I do judge. Next, is it bad to be so judgey?

I spent years of my life saying no. Especially since I usually keep my opinions to myself there’s no harm. But there is harm. Making judgments about things I don’t know details on, judging a person at a glance or from a few interactions, harm me. It highlights my insecurities.

I am not athletic. I lack hand-eye coordination and am horrifically ungraceful. I am awful at sports. I enjoy watching sometimes and used to play volleyball with my church. I went for fellowship more than for the joy of hitting the ball (which often landed on my face). However, I don’t feel insecure about my skills because it’s not something I place value on taking the time to learn. Would I feel embarrassed if I played next to a pro? Maybe, although I’d likely shrug my shoulders and declare, of course, they’re better than me. I wouldn’t feel insecure, though.

On the other hand, I do feel insecure about writing at times. And you betcha, I do find myself passing judgments on writers. This extends to plenty of other things. The case in point on listening to the Monday morning confessions included a confession from a special education teacher and a mom. My son is autistic and in special ed, and it’s so tempting to think at times I could do it better, or they’re not doing enough. I want to believe that because it makes me feel better about myself. It’s destructive. It doesn’t help them with their job or help my son. The same with the mother’s confession. I feel insecure about my mothering probably twenty times a day.

So my confession: I will continue to try not to be a Judgey McJudgey. I have improved from years ago and will continue to do so. In the meantime, I humbly ask no one put on their judgey pants when looking at my hot mess, lol.

Are you ever judgmental? If not, do you have another confession?

Truthful Tuesday- I hit snooze

finger on her lips. silence gestureI don’t know when this started. I used to wake up before the alarm. But now I hit snooze again, again,  and again. It’s a real problem when I’ve got to get the kids together and out the door on my own! Is anyone else a snoozer? Wait, don’t tell me yet. Just give me five more minutes to “rest my eyes”!

Positivity Monday- Half Way There

believe

 

I’m a huge believer in faking it until you make it. Bring an aura of calm and professionalism, and you’ll be more respected and reap greater results. I often feel like a duck. You might not see my legs working furiously under the water, but I promise you they are.

This weekend was a whirlwind for me. I had an author event at the Virginia Festival of the Book and got to hang out with so many lovely romance authors! The highlight for me was meeting Julia London, Margaret Locke, and Sue London!

I also packed some and helped move. My husband did SO much more work than me, but it’s been on my mind even if I couldn’t help physically.

earls-bluestocking-dream-5

I also published The Earl’s Bluestocking Dream! I’m so proud to offer this story to non-JAFF readers as the story line should appeal to all Regency romance and historical fiction lovers- especially with the new changes! I can’t wait to have time to work on some others and finally feel energized to continue my current projects. Now, it’s just a matter of getting settled in the new house.

Now, it’s just a matter of getting settled in the new house. Unless things change, the plan is for the kids and me to stay here until April 7. I am going down today (Monday, Marcy 27) to help arrange furniture but then driving right back up. Fingers crossed we can make it to spring break without me losing my mind. Then there will be two weeks off where my son can adjust to the new house and area before school starts.

It sounds like a lot! And it is! But I believe I can do it so I know I’m half way there.